Friday, April 27, 2012

Dealing with bullies in school, on the playground and cyber bullying

More Bullying Comeback Lines Click Here

Dealing with bullies in school, on the playground and cyber bullying the smart way
Verbal Judo Tongue Fu!  Peace Education The Bodyguard Way
Redirecting Behavior With Words - Wage Peace
by John Nottingham The Arizona Bullying Prevention Initiative and Phoenix BullyProof Project Bullying Prevention Initiative International USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix

Here are new bullying comeback lines you can use to handle a bullying situation.
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "Why do you waste your time saying that stuff to me?"
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "I'm not sure why you keep saying these things to me, but it really doesn't matter."
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "Okay. Finished?"
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "That's funny, but now I'm bored."
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "Those things are ridiculous, but whatever."
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "Here we go again, tell me when you are done."
  • Deadpan Bullying Comeback: "I don't do this to you. You should really think about what kind of person you are acting like."
Remember that it's not just what you say but HOW you say it. Your body language, tone and delivery are key to making these work.
Be Water When They Are Fire.  It's really hard to continue to be mean to someone when they are strong enough to stay nice.  Eventually, most people will learn to respect you and become your friend.  Only in rare cases do people continue after you have shown that you will not get angry or allow yourself to react in an exaggerated manner.  Be kind, compassionate and loving and you will be surprised at how others will treat you.  At first, it usually gets worse, but then it gets better as they learn how to treat you.  Many times, you will have earned their respect and become friends.

Who is mighty? One who has self control and can make friends from enemies.
Cyber bullying, also known as electronic bullying or online social cruelty, is defined as bullying through a variety of mediums including:
  • email
  • IM - instant messaging
  • Chat rooms
  • Websites
  • Gaming sites
  • Text messages through cell-phones
  • Pictures and videos
  • Whatever new technology is adopted by this demographic

  • Inform them to stop
  • Turn it off
  • Create new screen name and identity
  • Document and keep records of everything
  • Report it if necessary
  • Don't respond [starved response]
  • Give them options to be friendly or documented

 Wage Peace!

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Thwart Violence & Unleash Your Power With New Self Defense From Bodyguards

Learn To Be Streetwise Like a Bodyguard With a Unique Approach To Defensive Tactics and Personal Protection Self Defense Training

It is 20 hours that will transform the way you think about asocial violence, criminal encounters and your personal safety. Some people take the course to be able to better protect their loved ones."

You may have heard of self defense courses such as:

VIPER is a unique self defense program that you won't see other places. It is taught to select military, law enforcement and discriminating civilians to equip them with unique protective and personal security skills that include bodyguard tactics used to protect dignitaries, VIPS and even the President.
"We are not simply training people with a few tricks to defend themselves. We are not teaching them how to escalate a fight or stand toe to toe with a criminal.  Instead, we are training them to think like a professional protector - a bodyguard. The objective is simple, increase our clients personal security to become a hard target for predators and criminals."
Realistic Practical and Proven
Self Defense Security Specialist
John Nottingham
  • Self Defense from Punches & Kicks
  • Self Defense from Grabs, Holds, Pins
  • Self Defense from Knife, Gun
  • Defend the Most Common Crime Scenarios
  • Defend Stand up and Ground
  • Situational self-defense tactics

Origins in Military Hand to Hand Combat

VIPER stands for Violence Interdiction Personal Evolutionary Responses and was developed for a highly efficient and sophisticated self defense approach. The underlying principle behind VIPER is to do whatever is possible to derail the pathway to violence. From detection, deterrence, de-escalation, distractions, diversions, to defensive tactics, the course is far more comprehensive than a simple self defense class offered at a community center.

In-Depth Training - Like a Police Academy or Bodyguard School

VIPER personal protection course brings individuals to a high level of personal safety, confidence and peace of mind in a very short period of time. It isn't a magic pill, but it is highly efficient at teaching personal security options without the baloney most have come to associate with self defense courses.

The no nonsense approach is evident from the moment you begin.  It starts with classroom and a manual that includes such information as crime statistics and a fundamental knowledge of how criminals operate.  Clients learn to identify red flags, or pre-incident indicators of situations that might lead to violence.

Self Defense Mythbusters
Actual crime footage is used to point out lessons that can save your life or the lives of loved ones by avoiding or averting the elements that enable the crime process.
Next clients learn to dispel the common myths surrounding self defense such as the palm heel driving the nasal bone into the brain, the infamous groin kick, organized sportive fighting, social violence and the fallacy of "awareness"

Predator Vs Prey - Wolves, Sheep and Sheepdogs
VIPER clients then move into assertion competence, boundary setting and the role of tactical communication including verbal judo and predator-prey body language.  

Fear Factor
VIPER clients learn how to properly manage the onset stress response when confronted with decisions in those critical moments of a crime set up.  From the adrenaline dump, tactical breathing, and eliminating distracting worry, clients learn new tools for practical security.

VIPER physical intervention teaches how to stun, disable and inhibit function of the attackers body.  This is done through the study of vulnerable points that disrupt the nervous system, body systems or compromise structure.

Self Defense and The Law
Each client is briefed on the details and rights they have under the law.   They learn when, why, and how they have a right to self defense of self or action for the protection of others.

Safety is First, Last and Always
VIPER staff takes safety very seriously.  For those who do not have the right attitude or might put other clients at risk, they are not permitted to participate.  The ego must be checked at the door so that everyone feels comfortable and safe.  The goal is to reduce stress and worry, not increase it.  The staff uses an empowerment model, not a fear based or tribal hierarchical approach to teaching.

100% No Risk Money Back Guarantee
As always, this course has a guarantee to assure clients they are getting the value that they wanted.  If at any time a client feels that VIPER is not giving them more value that what they paid for, they can get a full refund, shake hands and part friends.

About John Nottingham
JOHN NOTTINGHAM, PI, EPS – Since 1989 John Nottingham has trained law enforcement, military, men, women and children various forms of self-protection. John discovered for every tragic abduction, or attack there are people who escaped. Bodyguard, law enforcement, military trainer and Martial Arts Master John Nottingham set began a quest to learn what specific thoughts and actions helped each adult and child escape from their attackers. GOOD MORNING ARIZONA, Channel 12 Safety Team, and others invited John on their show to share his unique approach to personal safety, security, self defense and conflict avoidance. His methodologies have been shared with law enforcement, military, bodyguards, men, women and children around the world. An Eagle Scout, Army Airborne Veteran, and Martial Arts Master, from bullying prevention to abduction options and learning to be your own bodyguard, John is an internationally respected specialist.

Listen to John Nottingham Discuss the USA Martial Arts Anti-Bully Program on the

Outreach Today Radio Show
Click for The Anti-Bully Interview

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Support USA Martial Arts Brown Belt Sean Dean with Great Strides CF Walk Fundraiser!

Meet Sean!

USA Martial Arts & i Love Kickboxing Phoenix are supporting Great Strides on Sunday for him. He's an awesome kid and one of our top students (a Brown Belt). Buy a shirt - help a kid with CF. Goooooooooood Karma. WWJD.  C'mon you Good Samaritans, let's step up and do what you can.

Get Your TEAM SEAN  T-shirts $10, Moisture Wick $16  

Team Sean is named after USA Martial Arts student Sean Dean. Sean is 11 years old, a proud Brown Belt with a Black Belt attitude, and was born with a genetic disease called Cystic Fibrosis.

Every year we walk in the Great Strides 5k Walk for CF. You can be a part of TEAM SEAN by registering to walk, sponsoring us [any amount is appreciated], coming out to join us even if you don't walk and support us by buying raffle tickets or a TEAM shirt! It is a time to show Sean he is not alone in his battle against this life threatening disease.

WHEN: Sunday April 22nd
WHERE: Tempe Center for the Arts
TIME: Check-in 8am Start 9am [find walker: Sean Dean in AZ]

Students will earn a stripe for your belt for any support. Buy a shirt, make a donation, walk or participate in supporting Sean.  Plus you will also satisfy a requirement for your citizenship / patriotism flag patch.  Wear your TEAM SEAN shirt in class this month to show you support Sean!

"I am asking all friends, USA Martial Arts and iLove Kickboxing members to support my student Sean. Sean is an exceptional individual, one of my best students and he needs to see our support. I'll be there and I hope you will be too." -John Nottingham

Sunday, April 15, 2012

BULLY Movie Reveals Hidden Lives of Bullied Children

Bully Movie for Bubble Wrapped Generation and Helicopter Parents?
Bullied as a child, Bully director Lee Hirsch shot the film to show the hidden lives of bullied children.  The film humanizes the issue and makes it personal as we get a glimpse into the pain of bullying from the middle school child's perspective.  He also follows the grief stricken parents of two boys who committed suicide.

Giving Bullied Kids a Voice
Director Lee Hirsch said at the Bully premier, "The inspiration for this film, the thing that carried with me is giving a voice to that experience. Giving everyone whose been through it a way to say, this is what I go through."

Inspiring a Change of Heart
Hirsch continues, "We see everyone as change makers that they can sort of make a decision after seeing this film. Tomorrow's gonna be a little different.  They're going to look out for someone, they're gonna make that effort to befriend someone that's being bullied.  You don't have to change the world to stop bullying, you just have to take those small steps."

Pointing Out The Problem of Bullying, The Bullied and Bystanders
BULLY reveals what can sometimes happen to vulnerable kids when they have no idea how to stand up for themselves, handle aggressive behavior or bullying situations. It exposes the ignorance surrounding peace education, conflict resolution and safety skills lacking among the overly dismissive, denying or rationalizing adults. While watching, my mind flashed back to myself at that age and the bullying and aggressive behavior that was so commonplace.

Putting a Face on Bullying
In an interview after a screening Hirsch stated:
"I felt that the hardest part of being bullied was communicating," Hirsch said. "And getting help. I couldn’t enroll people’s support. People would say things like 'get over it,' even my own father and mother. They weren't with me. That was a big part of my wanting to make the film. It's cathartic on a daily basis." Hirsch said he hoped the film grows far beyond him, inspiring advocacy, engagement, and empowerment not just in people who are being bullied and in their families, but by those of us who all too often stand by and do nothing. He stated, "I hope we build something that’s really sustainable. I hope this takes on a life of its own."

When Ignoring Bullying Fails
The timely documentary film clearly makes the point of the failure of these adults to know when, how or why to intervene, if at all. It could be easy to overly generalize and say that this is the case with most schools and administrations, however, I have met and worked with amazing teachers and administrations who take this seriously and objectively.

USA Martial Arts Phoenix is Proud to Offer 
Fully Sponsored Bullying Prevention Workshops & Camps

We can do better by sharing best practices and listening to the right specialists, experts and experienced professionals.  That is I created Bullying Prevention Initiative International and the Phoenix BullyProof Project.  Hope and help are available for those who reach out.

Read my full review and 2 part commentary here

*sources: Enews and Wikipedia Bully

Friday, April 13, 2012

Bully Movie Sparks Community Action in Phoenix Arizona

Bullying Specialist Offers Free Bullying Prevention Training To Phoenix Children
Anti-Bullying Programs | Bully Movie | Bullying Prevention | Phoenix BullyProof Self Defense | Bully Peace Education | Follow Up Training After Bullying Movie

New Movie BULLY Sparks Interest
The new BULLY movie has sparked interest in parents equipping their children with bullying prevention skills.  From knowing how to handle bullying, who to talk to, how to tell someone about being bullied and avoiding bullying at school, online or otherwise, Phoenix parents can now turn to a Bullying Prevention Specialist.

Is Your Child BullyProof?
BullyProof Vest is a program designed by professional protectors, namely a bodyguard and law enforcement trainer John Nottingham.  Nottingham has been teaching men, women and children how to successfully deal with bullying for over 26 years with is unique peace education process.

"Bullying is a symptom of several larger issues including, social intelligence, assertion competence, boundaries training, empowerment, respect, emotional health, personal safety and our fundamental values on peace education.  Our tools help identify the key issues of the bullying situation and offer practical steps to improve them." - John Nottingham, Bullying Specialist

Applying bodyguard tactics to bullying prevention is a unique idea.  This is one of the first programs to ever be designed by professional protectors in cooperation with other experts and refined over twenty five years.

Thinking Globally, Acting Locally To Stop Bullying
Nottingham Sword & Shield Security Bodyguards and USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix are sponsoring Bullying Prevention Camps and workshops for children and parents seeking help with BullyProofing kids.

"We are taking advantage of the media coverage from the new movie BULLY as well as Anti-Bully movement to train parents, teachers and children how to effectively handle bullying.  It's all fine to have awareness but now it is time for effective action."

BullyProof Your Child
For more information about BullyProofing your Arizona child, contact  John Nottingham will be conducting a series of BullyProof workshops and camps as a community service.
Join Stand4Change and Take a Stand Against Bullying!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Phoenix AZ School Children Take a Stand Against Bullying With Stand4Change National Event

For immediate release
Media contact: John Nottingham 602-896-8721

USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix is proud to announce our partnership in promoting Stand4Change.  Started by Ken Kragen (Defeat The Label), the mastermind behind "We Are The World" "Hands Across America" and Cisco System's "NetAid." Stand 4 Change is a Bullying awareness campaign involving millions of students around the world.

USA Martial Arts students will be bringing information to their school administrators to help students get involved.  Let's take a stand against bullying Phoenix Arizona!

Take a Stand Against Bullying on May 4, 2012!

Join celebrities like Justin Bieber, Cody Simpson and the Jonas Brothers in taking a stand against bullying.  This is an opportunity for you to be a part of history.

Enough is enough!
Now is the time to stand up against bullying. Join Defeat The Label on Stand4Change Day
and be a part of this historic rallying point for the anti-bullying movement.
Did you know?
• Every 7 minutes a child is bullied. (The U.S. Department of Justice)
• 1 in 7 students is either a bully or a victim of bullying. (
• 160,000 students stay home from school every day for fear of bullying. (National Association of School

Imagine millions of students and teachers across America standing for change to demonstrate their
commitment to putting an end to bullying. On Friday, May 4, 2012 at 12 p.m. EST, that image will become a reality as we all stop, stand and let the world know we will no longer tolerate bullying in our schools and our communities.
Let’s use peer pressure for something positive and bring attention to bullying, a serious issue that affects
everyone – bullies, victims and bystanders.

WHEN? Let’s make history on Stand4Change Day by standing together for Eive minutes, united against
bullying on Friday, May 4 at 12 PM EST.

WHERE? Every classroom, in every school in America.

WHY? If students in every school across the nation “Stand4Change” on May 4, they will not only set the
record as the largest group of people standing for a single cause at one time, they will draw national attention
to this critical issue.

HOW? Visit and register your school as a participant in Stand4Change Day on Friday,
May 4.
Stand4Change was developed by Defeat The Label and Ken Kragen. Ken Kragen is the creator and organizer of  “We Are the World”, “Hands Across America”, and Cisco System’s “NetAid”.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Bullying Prevention Program by Bodyguards Helps Kids Battle Bullying Peacefully and With Dignity

Bully Armor | Bullying Shield | BullyProof Vest Bully Defense | How To Deal With Bullying

BullyProof Vest is to my knowledge, the only bullying prevention program developed by professional protectors in cooperation with educators, therapists, parents and children.  I believe it is also the only program that incorporates advanced threat assessment.  Unlike most programs, it does not offer generic advice or overly specific advice as prescription without diagnosis.  Our first role is to listen, investigate and then advise an appropriate course of action.  Our focus is efficacy and have a 26 year track record of success in handling bullying behavior.  

Built On The Golden Rule - Respect, Empathy and Compassion
One of the key elements of our instruction is instilling a foundation of respect.  This is part of an inclusive school/organizational culture that comes from identifying core values then reinforcing those values at every echelon.  This culture of gentility, compassion and kindness goes a long way in making an environment a more civil place.

John Nottingham's Three Shields of Bullying Prevention
The child targeted for bullying, the child who is bullying and the social environment are all treated.  This is part of what we refer to as The Three Shields Bullying Prevention Strategy.  It is oriented toward a long term solution as well as immediate measures for the safety and well-being of a child.

BullyProofing & Victim-Proofing
Another component of our instruction encompasses emotional resilience training, but never blaming the child being targeted for bullying.  While other programs may encourage tattling (bullying by proxy/abdication), children learn the difference between telling and tattling (ratting - age appropriate vernacular).  Teachers are a resource - not professional protectors, bodyguards or bullying Police.  Punitive measures are a slippery slope that must be navigated carefully or it can backfire, escalate or have other unintended consequences.  Our approach takes a different path that is more child, proactive and safety oriented.  This gives children hope, dignity and options so they do not resort to detrimental or extreme ends.

Bullying Prevention is Built on a Foundation of Respect and a Respect Culture
The goal is to teach students to respect and protect free speech while protecting themselves with mental, emotional and even physical blocks or defense.  We role play body language (assertion competence), word blocks (Verbal Judo), and teach skills to put things in context (threat assessment) to make wiser judgement and problem solve (The ABC's of conflict avoidance/S.T.A.R.).

Bullying Prevention to Train The Trainers
More often these days my role is working with staff and other influential leaders to develop and assess bullying prevention programs and protocols, however, I am happy to be of any service that ads value or contributes toward the safety and peace of mind of children.  

Worldwide Bullying Prevention Collaboration to Raise Awareness
My Bullying Prevention Initiative International organization have just initiated a plan to collaborate with an international event on Bullying Prevention with the participation of school children around the world.  A variety of celebrities are on board as well as other significant promotional efforts.  This will be the largest awareness endeavor on bullying prevention to date.  We will be releasing more shortly.  Please advise if interested in being part of it.

Free Bullying Prevention Workshops "How To Deal With Bullying Like a Bodyguard" 
I also host regular Bullying Prevention workshops, camps and training as a community service at my USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing school in Phoenix. I would encourage readers to consider sending students, teachers, parents or interested parties. 

Here are some links to some information:

Even if you choose not to work with me, I hope these resources can provide you with some valuable insights, research and information to make a more informed choice.  Thank you in advance for your consideration and your efforts to build a more peaceful community.


John Nottingham
Arizona Bullying Prevention Project
Bullying Prevention Initiative International
Community Partners in Peace Education
USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix
Nottingham Sword & Shield Security Bodyguards WEBSPECIAL WEBSPECIAL

Bulling Secret Kid Code: "Bullying is bad but telling is worse"

Kids Tell Me Why They Allow Bullying.  Want to Know the Answer?
Free Bullying Prevention Workshops and Guide By John Nottingham's USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix & Nottingham Sword & Shield Security Bodyguards as part of the Arizona Bullying Prevention Project.

Over the years of being a target of bullying, clawing my way out and helping thousands of others do the same, I have a particular perspective with bullies, bullying and bystanders.  Once I am able to build a relationship of trust with my students I ask the children or teens why they don't tell when they are being bullied.

Here's what they say...

Bullied Tween: "Bullying is better than telling." 
They tell me that they put up with it because bullying is better than telling.  They feel or have experienced that if and when they tell that the bullying gets worse.  In some cases that is not true, however, for many of them it is.

Bullied Child: "I'd rather be bullied than caught tattling." 
In my own experience, I didn't want to tell because it did make things worse.  I also saw how my father over - reacted.  It made me feel like a failure as his son.  Now I know that it was just his love for me and misguided attempt at protecting me.  For the most part, he wasn't angry at me but rather the situation.

Bullied Teen:  "Being bullied is better than ratting.  It's just the rule of cool in school" 
To be frank though, my Dad did carry a bit of disapproval that I wasn't standing up for myself like he would have.  I could see it and feel it.  The fact that I was being bullied also embarrassed my brothers that I was such a pansy I couldn't handle my business.  I just didn't have a mean or violent bone in my body and couldn't bear the thought of harming someone or getting in trouble.  I also didn't want my peers seeing me as a tattle tale or rat, who got them in trouble.  I wanted my family, teachers and peers to like, or at least respect me.  In my kid way of thinking (victim mindset), it seemed easier to take the abuse and keep things manageable.  I was wrong, but that was my uninformed thinking at that time in my life.

Reasons Kids Don't Tell About Bullying
  • Overreaction of parents, teachers or coaches
  • Have been ignored in the past "It doesn't do any good."
  • Unwanted attention (Make an embarrassing fuss)
  • Loss of respect and/or acceptance of peers
  • Feeling of failure
  • Afraid of retribution and consequences
  • Don't want to get in trouble
  • Don't want to get other kids in serious trouble
  • Fear from threats, intimidation
  • Fear of disappointing parents, teachers, others
  • Don't want to admit that it bothers them as much as it does 
  • Feel even less accepted and like something is wrong with them when they have to acknowledge it or talk about it
  • Past experiences taught them it makes bullying get worse
  • Loss of respect and dignity in others eyes
We'll help you find your voice, your power and your ability to protect yourself with dignity.
For most children and teens it is about peer acceptance and survival.  They have to live in a kids world where they are forced into structured environments where they struggle to fit in.   Additionally I find out that they do not want to feel weak or whiny - some of the same feelings I had when I was their age.  The drive to be accepted is so great that they weigh the abuse and choose to take it.

Help is Available When You're Ready
In order for this to change, several things need to take place.  It starts with changing the psychology, mindset and belief system of the targeted individual.  Of course there is much more to it than that, but it is the foundation from which everything else is built.  Not only do I have personal experience with it, I've helped thousands of others as well.  There is hope for you or your child to move from bullying target/victim to victor.

If you want to learn more about how to effectively treat bullying, stop victimization and end bullying permanently then you'll want to join us on Facebook or get in touch with us right away.  Many of the resources and information are free.  We can also recommend successful bullying prevention programs.

I'm offering my help to you or your child.  USA Martial Arts & Kickboxing Phoenix is offering free bullying prevention training and a guide.  Simply contact us at and provide your contact information.  We promise to handle the situation with discretion, confidentiality, respect and preserve you or your child's dignity.  We're on your side and have lots of experience.

Don't give up!  You're worth fighting for,

John Nottingham
Bullying Prevention Specialist
Bullying Prevention Initiative International  BPII Facebook
Arizona BullyProof Project  ABPP Facebook

Sunday, April 1, 2012

New Bullying Prevention Organization Offers Scholarships to Anti-Bullying Academy

New Bullying Prevention Organization Offers Scholarships to Anti-Bullying Academy and Teaches Kids How to Be Their Own Bullying Bodyguard

BULLY Movie Raises Awareness and Prompts Parents To Seek Training for Kids
With the launch of the new movie BULLY, some parents are seeking expert advice on how to train their children how to properly handle bullying.  A new organization called the Bullying Prevention Initiative International is opening up new chapters of Bullying Prevention training programs including one here in Phoenix Arizona.

Founder John Nottingham knows what it's like to be bullied and that's why he created this organization and network.  His goal is to train teachers, parents and children to effectively handle bullying in the most peaceful and practical way.

His Phoenix Martial Arts school is spearheading the program with sponsorship from his Security and Bodyguard Agency.
"We're offering free BullyProofing workshops to children who are being bullied.  Additionally, we have a growing network of affiliate training centers, mostly martial arts schools, who are teaching our specialized curriculum.  It includes verbal judo, conflict resolution skills, confidence building and physical, online and mental bullying prevention.", said Bullying Specialist John Nottingham

Nottingham's BullyProof Vest program offers a much different approach to the standard school-wide Anti-Bully programs you may see in schools.  He says he created the organization because children were falling through the cracks with those failed programs.  Having successfully taught men, women, boys and girls how to successfully deal with bullying over the past 26 years, he felt compelled to take action.

For information on free bullying prevention training or a BullyProof Vest Academy near you contact info@usa-martialarts or visit facebook.